In this week’s episode, Amrit interviews Tracy Kopp, owner and director of The Urban Alchemist, a holistic health clinic with a team of over fifteen expert health and wellness practitioners providing wellbeing solutions for their clients’ mind, body and soul.
Tracy, with so much courage and vulnerability, has come to share her story. She has reached a point in her journey where sharing what she has learned for the benefit of others feels an important part of her healing process.
Amrit and Tracy dive deep into an open and heartfelt conversation about the wounds that have been stuck in Tracy’s body and heart for so long, the healing process she is facing with amazing fortitude and the positive effects on her most loved ones.
The ‘mother wound’ may be defined as a loss or a lack of mothering. This is typically a deficit in the mother-daughter relationships that is passed down through generations of women in patriarchal cultures, and it is a reflection on how we have experienced parenting and how we parent.
In her early twenties, Tracy suffered from anxiety and depression. She looked to talk therapy for answers but couldn’t find her way out of feeling like a victim in her relationships. She blamed her mother for a great deal of her pain. Like many mother/daughter relationships, theirs was marked by emotional distance. Having never been shown how to manage her own feelings, Tracy’s mother had been unable to pass on this skill to her daughter.
Tracy became a mother of a beautiful baby girl, Ivy, at just 21. Neither herself nor her partner had any idea of the responsibilities of parenthood. In Ivy’s early years, Tracy enjoyed motherhood and her child tremendously, but things began to get dark. She and her partner were constantly fighting. Ivy’s needs went unmet for long periods of time and when the family eventually broke down, Ivy suffered deep trauma as her parent’s feud escalated.
As a single mother carrying most of the load of caring for her daughter, Tracy was consumed by her own difficulties. She lacked the skills to control her own feelings of rage and despair, and acted abusively toward her daughter much of the time. She knew this was harmful for her daughter, but the struggle with her own demons left little room for learning patience or grace.
Over time, Tracy saw the impact this cycle was having on her daughter. She wondered if the damage done was so great that their relationship might never be repaired.
With a great deal of shame and fear, she decided it was time to have a look at what was going on inside herself. By turning within and facing what was hard to see, she began to recognize the harmful patterns inherent in her parenting and slowly break them.
Today Ivy and Tracy have reached a place of real care and love where there is true understanding of the other’s experience.
“I feel that she forgives me in a really meaningful way because she has seen how deep I will dig for her.”
Tracy knows that her story is not unique and feels that by speaking openly about her journey, she may help others recognise that they, too, can make amends when they’ve hurt someone close.
Welcome Tracy Kopp to the Inspired Evolution!:(00:00:00)
Impetus to reach the point of wanting to share something:(00:02:30)
About a motherhood journey:(00:04:13)
Some of the biggest things Tracy’s daughter has taught her about her:(00:06:23)
About kids showing a mirror of integrity up to their parents:(00:07:21)
What it was like raising a daughter on her own:(00:08:19)
Noticing things were not working in the relationship with her daughter:(00:10:07)
How do you fix an unhealthy relationship:(00:14:54)
How is Tracy able to talk about it now without energetic charges around it:(00:15:44)
What Tracy has had to own:(00:19:02)
Rationalizing situations everyday reflected in Tracy’s own journey:(00:21:02)
About identifying things, honouring them and treating them:(00:26:41)
Vision for intergenerational healing:(00:30:14)
More meaning to healing when it wasn’t about Tracy anymore:(00:34:36)
Why Tracy is willing to share now:(00:50:13)
What is Tracy’s hope:(00:56:41)
Tracy’s beautiful words to her daughter:(01:01:10)
Tracy’s beautiful words to her mother:(01:02:41)
Tracy as a child dropping into the episode, what would she see?:(01:05:08)
Connect with Tracy Kopp:
- Website: https://www.theurbanalchemist.com.au
- Youtube Channel:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvRoFL_EwngSqp6WCeZLdJQ